By Kirstie –
It can be incredibly difficult to make decisions as an adult with daily, unpredictable, chronic pain. Things so simple to others — like traveling and going out, or even serious subjects such as marriage or switching career paths — are daunting. To us, they can seem so close, yet so far away… this is what it’s like to live with chronic pain.
You watch people living what seems like their best life. You feel somewhat stuck, unable to commit to anything. And then comes sadness, it knocks you down to a place so low, you feel broken beyond repair. You become a hollowed figure of the person you used to be.
If this is how you feel right now, you are not alone. I’ve been in a funk for the past seven years. Some days are better than others, but I often find myself looking back at years where my health was great. I’ve come to find out the hard way it’s better not to compare the two, and to rather view each day as a new day.
So where am I right now?
I’m currently snuggled up in a blanket on the couch with my furry companion.
A couple years ago, right after I graduated from high school, I decided it was time for me to get a dog. For some people, a dog is not just a pet. To me, she’s a lot more.
And I understand your perspective. But for a person whose daily functioning is subpar, to say the least, this was a life altering decision. This was especially true since it was only a few weeks after being diagnosed with Lupus, one of my many demons. I needed to be in a good place in life, a place able to take care of another living, breathing, thing.
Meet Abby, a 9 year old beagle and dachshund mix. She was a dog I fell in love with at the local SPCA, and later, she became my whole world.
Abby was part of a large rescue sting from a puppy mill, where dozens of other dogs were saved. Due to her past trauma, she can be overwhelmed easily by sounds and people; particularly males. But once she feels she can trust you, prepare for lots of kisses and tail wags so powerful her entire body wiggles with each wag.
I also have found out within the past few years she has a great gift. In my arsenal of diagnosis I have chronic complex migraines. Abby can sense when one of my attacks is coming, and will do a head nudge, or excessive finger licking to alert me it’s time to get medication in my system before all hell breaks loose.
Many may not believe there is a thing such as a migraine alert dog, or that they can sense any changes… but I do. She is proof of that, and has showed me time and time again.
Having Abby in my life has opened up my world in the best ways. Every negative thing in my body was replaced with a new warmth. Everything feels right. I feel…safe. Her affection and playfulness reminds me I am worthy, and that it’s okay to not know exactly how each day will pan out.
So in reality, who rescued who?